David Cooke's Werecard

Human Name: David Cooke
Were Name: Haven't felt the need to take another name. I'll just stick with the one I've been given.
Phenotype: Wolf
Shifting Ability: See text below.
Birthdate: 25 June 1965

Birthplace: Coventry, West Midlands, England
Home Territory: Milton Keynes (where I curently live),
Otley (where my patner's family live),
Coventry to Kenilworth (where I roamed as I grew up)
Dream Territory: Plenty of dappled broadleaved woodland, cool pine forests, crystal clear lakes, tall grass to play in. The sweet smell of gorze bushes, heather to leap though, ice cold streams of meltwater. Soft mud, hard granite, bright quartz. Stone walls in the pouring rain. Rolling chalk downs after a hard winter's frost, tenacious moss on a misty mountain side. Drizzly rain that sparkles in the fur. Trees floating in bluebells. The power and the presence of an eletrical storm. A sandy beach to pad across at dusk.

I don't think it can be any one place.

Physical Description, Human:[ I'm colour blind (red/green deficient) ]
[ so this is based on what others tell me ]
Male, 6'1" fairly slim (~11st), brown hair, hazel eyes (that's just another way of saying green isn't it?), moustache, glasses.
Physical Description, Were: [ Now of course, I'm making the colour up! ]
A wolf morph, about 6'1" (185cm) slim build (i.e. about my own size), maybe taller if walking digitigrade - still figuring that out. Fur colour and pattern to match my "adopted" wolf at the Iberian Wolf Rescue Centre (basic light grey/brown with white under muzzle, chest and belly).
Human Career: Computer programmer (C++), & sysadmin by default (SunOS, HP/UX) for a "Global Asset Allocation" company.
For techno freaks:
Previously I've done device drivers, network firmware (FDDI), ASIC design, board design (FDDI, Ethernet, Memories), and "standard cell" IC (VIC068).

Hobbies/Interests: Airbrush (still learning), Animation (planning to do some), Computing (programming, admin), Drawing/Photoshop, Electronics (mainly digital), Modelling (still working on an Alien kit), Photography (when I'm in the mood for it), Reading (mainly science fiction/fantasy), Walking/Rambling
Favorite Movies: Blade Runner, Dark Star, Alien(s), T1, T2, Bell, Book & Candle, How to Murder Your Wife, Rear Window, Wallace & Grommit "films".
Favorite Were-movie: none - I've seen alot of bad ones, and haven't bothered seeing any more. Hopefully this group can point me in the right direction. The last one I saw was that 4 part made for TV thing that was shown in the UK.
Favorite Literature: Diskworld books - Terry Pratchett, White Light, Software, Wetware, Freeware - Rudy Rucker (cyberpunk), Hitch Hikers Guide & Dirk Gently books - Douglas Adams, My family and other animals - Gerald Durrell, Robot novels - Asimov
Favorite Were Literature: Would you count "Men at Arms" for Angua?
Favorite Art: Peter Markey, C.R. Macintosh & similar
Favorite Were-art: Favourite wolf pics are by Jurek.
Favorite Quote: "How can it not know what it is?"
Favorite Were Saying/Quote: (awaiting authors permission to include my current favourite furry quote - but now is not the time to ask)
Favorite Personal Quote: I never said it was a particulary _good_ idea.
Favorite Song/Band(s): (a sample) Bladerunner theme - Vangelis, Deep Purple in Concert with the Royal Philharmonic, Love and a million other things - Claudia Brucken, Metamatic - John Foxx, Sugar Tax - OMD, Broadsword & the Beast - Jethro Tull
Favorite Season: Its the constant change that make each one special.
Favorite Holidays: The one I'm looking forward to now!
Preferred Prey: I'll admit it - chocolate.
Also: Chicken and cashew nuts in a yellow bean sauce, bacon butties, black pudding, ice cream, Marston's Pedigree.
(Now I'm hungry)
Hunting Tips: Go with the moment.
Preferred Method of Attack: Prise the two halves apart, and eat the middle first ;)
Favorite Non-Were Mythological Beast: Griffins
Feelings Toward Vampires: Never met any.
Feelings Toward Normal Humans: Depends on the individual, but as a species I do despair. They don't even seem able to understand the world they have made, let alone the one they have destroyed.

Personal Lycanthropy:

A part of my nature is wolf - its not another persona, not some role play character, its not a spirit guide. It is not "pure" wolf either, and I don't expect to be able to shift into a wolves mindset - in the same way I know I'll never be able to shift totally into a human mindset. However the mix of these two sides varies. I haven't figured out why yet, although it is often coincident with a change of mood - not really sure if one causes the other or not. I don't know if any of it is affected by the moon - I _like_ bright moonlit nights, I'll sit and watch the moon, and I can feel closer to my wolf side, but I can sit in broadleaved woodland in the middle of the day, or pad across frosty grass at dawn, and feel just as close.

My realisation began when Reference.com mailed me the first 50 lines of the alt.fan.furry FAQ in response to a query about something entirely non-furry. I downloaded the whole thing because I was curious (and to verify that it didn't contain any of my keywords - which it didn't). It then didn't take me long to find the alt.lifestyle.furry FAQ. A whole range of ideas and values that I had been struggling with as separate issues finally had a focus, a name, and *others* had been there before. I had found a new home. Thanks to some crosspostings to alt.horror.werewolves I have now found that is isn't what I would have expected, and there is _another_ group of kindered spirits.

I'll still continue to think of myself as furry (meaning furry lifestyler) I guess until I can really pinpoint the difference between the two groups.

Understanding my true nature has been a very liberating experience. Before I've had to rationalise my "behavioural problems" as the result of childhood influences, resulting in a lot of bad feeling towards my parents. Now I know where I stand its actually seems easier to interact with "mundanes". Where once stood a socially inept human now stands a furry with a _gift_ for a foreign language. Altogether I'm a happier soul than I was. Frienships with my own kind have given me the self confidence to interact socially in the mundane world.

I've had Dreams and lucid dreams where I have been an anthro-wolf, and one instance where myself as an anthro-wolf was transformed while running into a true wolf. Being able to run on all fours was an exhilerating experience. As a child I used to have Dreams about being a dolphin, but I have yet to explore that again. I've had a couple of shift experiences where I feel like I have an anthro wolf body (I'm sure it wasn't a physical shift as I was in a park at the time - somebody would have noticed ;), but no change of mental state. Until someone comes up with a better terminology, I'm going to continue calling it a sensory shift (thanks Locandez).

The whole set of ideas is still very new to me. I'm so busy trying to understand what furry/wereness means to me, that I haven't even had time to think about _why_ I am this way. That is another journey which I have yet to begin. Thanks to my new friends I have also begun to explore my spirituality too. All in all its a process of realisation and integration.